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Sign up todayA Well-Trained Wife
My Escape from Christian Patriarchy
Narrator
Tia Levings
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Length
10 hours 53 minutes
Language
English
Bookseller recommendation
“Growing up evangelical this book was a little triggering. Tia tells her story with honesty and compassion. Must read for everyone who wants to know more about fundamentalism. ”
— Tania • White Rose Books & More
Bookseller recommendation
“How do you write a review to say you loved a book that is about the absolute worst experience of a person’s life? Tia Levings story gave me goosebumps, made me want to vomit, and brought me to tears as I tried to imagine how she endured so much and found the strength to save herself and her children. In the vein of Exvangelicals, this is an important story to read to understand how to support those who have escaped Christian Fundamentalism and start to recognize the abuses that are still happening daily to young women everywhere.”
— Julie • Roundabout Books
Bookseller recommendation
“This book was a little triggering because while I was not deep into fundamentalism, some of my friends were. I always resisted and this book gives a bit more insight into growing up fundamentalist and the slippery slope between a relationship with Christ and a cult.”
— Tania • White Rose Books & More
Bookseller recommendation
“Difficult but fascinating memoir of the author’s life in her church, her faith in God and the marriage she tried to hold together during extremely challenging circumstances. Through her writing, I could see her grow through each change in her life. Hard to put down. ”
— Nona • CoffeeTree Books
Bookseller recommendation
“It's always challenging to review and rate someone's memoir. Tia's writing is fantastic and even more compelling is her story. Wow! It's hard to put myself in her shoes because I don't think I could have made it as long as she did. I also don't think I have anywhere near enough courage to leave. I sincerely hope this story reaches women in similar circumstances and provides an example of a better life. Listened on libro.fm and I always love hearing a memoir from the author herself.”
— Liz • The Well-Read Moose
Bookseller recommendation
“The most chilling horror stories are the true ones. Tia Levings recounts her harrowing life story as a young woman sucked into a fundamentalist church sect that mandates that women's sole roles are to become wives and mothers; to be 100% submissive to their husbands, to silence their own voices, to isolate from the world, and to endure abuse. I could not put this book down. Ultimately, Levings emerges into the light, healing the wounds she endured since childhood but at great cost. Religious trauma is real, and Levings details how it is inflicted - and how she continues to heal from it. A must-read!”
— Donna • The Well-Read Moose
This gripping audiobook is a strong choice alongside books about high-demand religion, overcoming odds, and finding inner strength in impossible situations."—Booklist (Starred Review)
This program is read by the author.
“Today it hit me when he hit me, blood shaking in my brain. Maybe there wasn’t a savior coming. Maybe it was up to me to save me.”
Recruited into the fundamentalist Quiverfull movement as a young wife, Tia Levings learned that being a good Christian meant following a list of additional life principles––a series of secret, special rules to obey. Being a godly and submissive wife in Christian Patriarchy included strict discipline, isolation, and an alternative lifestyle that appeared wholesome to outsiders. Women were to be silent, “keepers of the home.”
Tia knew that to their neighbors her family was strange, but she also couldn't risk exposing their secret lifestyle to police, doctors, teachers, or anyone outside of their church. Christians were called in scripture to be “in the world, not of it.” So, she hid in plain sight as years of abuse and pain followed. When Tia realized she was the only one who could protect her children from becoming the next generation of patriarchal men and submissive women, she began to resist and question how they lived. But in the patriarchy, a woman with opinions is in danger, and eventually, Tia faced an urgent and extreme choice: stay and face dire consequences, or flee with her children.
Told in a beautiful, honest, and sometimes harrowing voice, A Well-Trained Wife is an unforgettable and timely memoir about a woman's race to save herself and her family and details the ways that extreme views can manifest in a marriage.
A Macmillan Audio production from St. Martin’s Press.
TIA LEVINGS writes about the realities of religious trauma and Christian fundamentalism. Based in Jacksonville, Florida, she works as a freelance Content Strategist and travels often. She is mom to four incredible adults, and she loves to hike, paint, and daydream. A Well-Trained Wife is her first book.
TIA LEVINGS writes about the realities of religious trauma and Christian fundamentalism. Based in Jacksonville, Florida, she works as a freelance Content Strategist and travels often. She is mom to four incredible adults, and she loves to hike, paint, and daydream. A Well-Trained Wife is her first book.
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Reviews
"Searing...Levings’s visceral prose holds nothing back, and her efforts to let go of the patriarchal beliefs of her youth fascinate. This stands out among the rising tide of memoirs from those who’ve left the evangelical church." -Publishers Weekly
"This book stands out among other narratives about overcoming religious trauma in that it peels back the layers of Christian fundamentalism, exposing why it’s so attractive to people hungry for assurance and certainty. A devastatingly triumphant story that will be a beacon for many women who suffer in silence." -Kirkus Reviews, starred
“Rebellious and riveting- A Well trained Wife is a rare gem of a journey from horrific abuse to victorious healing. Not many survivors are willing to lift the veil of shame that shrouds most stories of domestic and cultic abuse. Private and painful, this important memoir will shine light on the darkest crimes within the religious patriarchy with hope for the future -A triumph for all survivors.” - Sarah Edmondson -author of Scarred: The True Story of How I Escaped NXIVM, the Cult That Bound My Life and host of “A Little Bit Culty” podcast
"It's hard to imagine the stores of courage Tia Levings drew on to write this gripping account of living in and then escaping the shackles of an abusive marriage fueled by high-control religion and dogmatic theology. With clear-eyed precision and riveting narrative voice, Levings pulls back the veil to expose the often clandestine, radical patriarchy found in many fundamentalist congregations—a doctrine that inflicts irreparable harm on girls and women by insisting their roles are to sustain and satisfy the men around them through submission and strict adherence to purity culture. For any of us whose religious upbringings were anywhere adjacent to these damaging mindsets, Levings revelations about her experiences reverberate to the core. A Well-Trained Wife is an unforgettable and incisive testament to one woman's daring to break free, speak truth to power, and finally find her authentic self along the path toward healing. - Melanie Brooks, author of A Hard Silence and Writing Hard Stories
“In this brave memoir on domestic violence within Christian patriarchy, Tia Levings vulnerably shares her story of survival. With devastating detail, she reveals the many shades of abuse that happen within the world of evangelicalism, a world that was supposed to protect her. The many women who have walked this path from oppression to freedom will find solidarity in these pages.” - Cait West, author of Rift
"I've never given a book a standing ovation until this one. A Well-Trained Wife is a prayer, for all of us. The world is lucky Tia Levings found her freedom and her voice. A reckoning for those who sanction abuse in the name of salvation." - Ashleigh Renard, author of Swing
"With unflinching honesty and relentless self-reflection, Levings’ debut memoir is a portrait in courage." - Julie Bogart, author of The Brave Learner and Raising Critical Thinkers