From the pink ribbons to the chat rooms to the Web sites that sell related accessories and stuffed animals, breast cancer has morphed from a disease to an experience. And at every step of the way, society tells women that this experience can teach them profound lessons, transform them into wiser, more insightful people, and maybe even give them a peek at the meaning of life. But what if it doesn't? Five Lessons I Didn't Learn From Breast Cancer is Shelley Lewis's thoroughly modern, slightly contrarian take on "doing" breast cancer in an epiphany-free zone, where the goal is simply to get through it and get the hell back to your life. Proving that chemotherapy can eradicate everything except a sense of humor. Lewis shares her five strategies for coping, and then reveals the real, not-so-meaningful insights learned from breast cancer, including "If you honestly think breast cancer is a gift, you can't come to my birthday" and "Lie to yourself (it's sooo helpful)." A wonderful interweaving of the author's personal story, interviews with breast cancer survivors, and a sharp-eyed journalist's look at the breast cancer "community." Five Lessons is full of unconventional wisdom, unexpected advice, and hilarious observations about life inside the pink bubble.