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The Men I Didn't Marry by Janice Kaplan & Lynn Schnurnberger
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The Men I Didn't Marry

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Narrator Susan Denaker

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Length 11 hours 22 minutes
Language English
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The authors of the national bestsellers Mine Are Spectacular! and The Botox Diaries apply their trademark wit and wisdom to another delicious adventure. Join Hallie Lawrence Pierpont as she’s whisked away on a journey into her past love life that leads to her future.

Hallie’s husband, Bill, doesn’t even wait until they get home from dropping off their youngest daughter at Yale to announce that he’s leaving Hallie. After first succumbing to an Oreo-induced coma, Hallie is determined to get her life back. An unexpected call from an old college boyfriend sets a plan in motion. Whatever happened to all those men she didn’t marry?

With her best friend, Bellini Baxter, Hallie visits an all-night spray-tanning salon and Soho’s legendary Cellulite Exorcist. Her college-age children are protective of their mom but embarrassed to have her back in teenage territory–the world of dating and condoms. Finally, Hallie confronts the great love she swore she’d never see again and, while resolving an old family secret, reconciles with her long-estranged sister.

Janice Kaplan and Lynn Schnurnberger tell a heartfelt and hilarious story about moving forward by looking back. By turns poignant and laugh-aloud funny, this is a must-read for every woman who’s ever wondered about the men she didn’t marry.

Janice Kaplan has enjoyed wide success as a magazine editor, television producer, writer, and journalist. The former editor in chief of Parade magazine, she is the author or coauthor of twelve books, including the New York Times bestsellers The Gratitude Diaries and I’ll See You Again. She lives in New York City and Kent, Connecticut.

Lynn Schnurnberger is the bestselling author or coauthor of several books, including The Botox Diaries and Mine Are Spectacular! She has written for New York magazine, The New York Times, and People, among others, and has made regular television appearances, most notably on The Oprah Winfrey Show, Good Morning America, and Entertainment Tonight. She is also the founder of Foster Pride, a nonprofit that provides art classes and mentoring to New York City foster children.

Susan Denaker’s extensive theatre credits include numerous plays in the West End of London, national tours, and many English Rep companies, including a season with Alan Ayckbourn’s company in Scarborough. More recently in the United States, Susan has appeared in Our Town and Sweet Bird of Youth, both at the La Jolla Playhouse, and Breaking Legs at the Westport Playhouse.

Janice Kaplan has enjoyed wide success as a magazine editor, television producer, writer, and journalist. The former editor in chief of Parade magazine, she is the author or coauthor of twelve books, including the New York Times bestsellers The Gratitude Diaries and I’ll See You Again. She lives in New York City and Kent, Connecticut.

Lynn Schnurnberger is the bestselling author or coauthor of several books, including The Botox Diaries and Mine Are Spectacular! She has written for New York magazine, The New York Times, and People, among others, and has made regular television appearances, most notably on The Oprah Winfrey Show, Good Morning America, and Entertainment Tonight. She is also the founder of Foster Pride, a nonprofit that provides art classes and mentoring to New York City foster children.

Susan Denaker’s extensive theatre credits include numerous plays in the West End of London, national tours, and many English Rep companies, including a season with Alan Ayckbourn’s company in Scarborough. More recently in the United States, Susan has appeared in Our Town and Sweet Bird of Youth, both at the La Jolla Playhouse, and Breaking Legs at the Westport Playhouse.

Janice Kaplan has enjoyed wide success as a magazine editor, television producer, writer, and journalist. The former editor in chief of Parade magazine, she is the author or coauthor of twelve books, including the New York Times bestsellers The Gratitude Diaries and I’ll See You Again. She lives in New York City and Kent, Connecticut.

Lynn Schnurnberger is the bestselling author or coauthor of several books, including The Botox Diaries and Mine Are Spectacular! She has written for New York magazine, The New York Times, and People, among others, and has made regular television appearances, most notably on The Oprah Winfrey Show, Good Morning America, and Entertainment Tonight. She is also the founder of Foster Pride, a nonprofit that provides art classes and mentoring to New York City foster children.

Susan Denaker’s extensive theatre credits include numerous plays in the West End of London, national tours, and many English Rep companies, including a season with Alan Ayckbourn’s company in Scarborough. More recently in the United States, Susan has appeared in Our Town and Sweet Bird of Youth, both at the La Jolla Playhouse, and Breaking Legs at the Westport Playhouse.

Illustration of person sitting

Shop small, give big!

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Reviews

Praise for Janice Kaplan and Lynn Schnurnberger

Mine Are Spectacular!

"A funny, buoyant novel...[the authors'] combination of whip-smart dialogue, spot-on metaphors and the occasional steamy bedroom scene creates a hilarious hit that gives chick lit just the kick to keep it from going stale. As Sara's girlfriend Berni might remark, Mine Are Spectacular! is better than a box of bonbons."
–People (four-star review)

"Ferociously funny."
-The New York Times

“[The authors] are deservedly renowned for their ability to document the social habits and favorite trends of wealthy women.”
–Chicago Sun-Times

“Makes Wisteria Lane look like Sesame Street.”
–New Jersey Life

The Botox Diaries

“This summer’s must-have beach read!”
–ABC’s The View

“[A] midlife-crisis bonbon, which should be sold with fuzzy slippers and a tube of cucumber eye gel.”
–The New York Times Book Review

"A book you can't put down...a hilarious new novel offering a fresh and irreverent take on the lives and relationships of women in their forties."
--WCBS-TV

“Fast-paced and with zingers on every page.”
–The Washington Post

“A sexy romp . . . which leads [its characters] charmingly back to the basics of being best friends.”
–Elle Expand reviews
Give audiobooks, support local bookstores! Start gifting